CH 4 – “Solitude” – The Deadbeat Master and Genius Disciple’s Misunderstood Workshop

(TL Note: I had some real problems with this chapter so sorry for being a bit late.)

The only people who understand the loneliness that comes from solitude are people who aren’t alone.

After 5 years, I have come to understand this.

Through hard times, sad times and happy…times.

I, who had no memory from before wondered why I was in this place called the slum district. All I did was live day to day as an empty shell.

There was one person who was with me.

I don’t know that person’s name.

She was an old woman who was very up in age, and as I think on it now she was looked like a ghostly apparition.

That’s how the old woman looked to me.

With a wrinkled face she was always cursing the world, and she was always staring at something no one could see while spitting insults. But when I brought her scraps of food she would have a warm smile on her face and she would tell me many stories.

The tales of the saint in service of God.

The tales of the hero who battled evil.

And then, the simple everyday tales of people living their lives.

To me, who was truly empty inside, I looked up to all of the characters in those stories equally.

But at the same time, they made me question many things.

——The saint who served God.

The person who in the end was betrayed by the people and was executed for a crime they didn’t commit. At the very end they were able to pray to god with a calm expression.

Why was the saint able to serve God to that extent?

Why was the saint able to think of others to such a fervent extent?

I could not understand this.

——The hero who battled evil.

The hero who fought the demon king, who can be said to be the origin of all calamity, lost many of that person’s comrades in the battle.

Taking up the thoughts of his comrades who were cut down, that hero splendidly won the fight.

Why did the hero and their comrades take part in such a dangerous battle?

Then even if the hero took up the feelings of their fallen comrades, how did the hero feel after winning a battle that took the their comrades dying to accomplish it?

I could not understand this.

—— And at last, the simple everyday tales of people living their lives.

People who spend their days laughing and arguing in a warm household, or gathering food while working together with their neighbors strengthening their bonds.

Exactly what is a warm household?

Exactly what is family?

Laughing and arguing, what kind of actions are these?

I could not understand this.

Of course, at that time I was unable to think and question my surroundings in such clear words.

Instead of questioning, my feelings of admiration were probably stronger.

But even then, there is no mistake that my past-self had accumulated many questions in my heart.

Since I didn’t understand anything, I flooded the old woman with questions.

Why? Why? Why? There were times when the old woman was able to answer my flood of questions, there were times when I became angry, there were times I even became violent.

——But at that time, my own “simple everyday life” certainly gave me something.

After 2 years of living in the slums, I clearly remember that time.

This happened in the summer around 6 months before the cold winter night I met my master.

It’s easy to survive in the summer.

At any rate, since its warm, grass grows well and there are a lot of bugs.

It rains often so it’s easy to get drinking water, and you can wash yourself.

Tee hee, well this is why the summer is comfortable.

The people who lived in the main streets bathed in sunlight always made a face and left whenever they met eyes with me. As I stretched out my hand to pick up food scraps the people would yell “Filthy, get out of here” and shoo me away.

Yet I didn’t resent them.

To me, who was empty inside and didn’t know anything, they were like the characters of the stories I loved. So of course, there would be incredibly cold to me.

Maybe I felt guilty for entering such a pretty place even if it’s in order to get food.

Even though I’m talking about myself, I was too ignorant at that time.

At that time, I should have lived with my head held high. After being taught every day by my master who is independent and allows no one to get in his way. This is what I thought.

Haha, I seem to have gone off track.

Well it can be helped. Even I have times where I want to talk about my past.

Anyway, during one summer that was supposed to be easy to survive, that incident happened.

As usual, I went and got food for myself and the old lady, as I was heading back to the dilapidated house without a roof that the old lady was always in. I discovered some black birds flying in the direction I was heading to.

——I had a bad feeling.

Underneath where those black birds fly, there is always someone who for any number of reasons has died.

The old man who only once gave me a piece of sweet fruit.

The one-handed boy who once in a while I passed by in the street.

The woman who whenever I saw her would constantly circle the base tall pillars.

All of them, where pecked at by those birds after they…..

As my past-self thought this, I looked up to the sky and closed my eyes then I opened them.

Then, I, who never tries to waste my stamina, started running and made my way to the dilapidated house.

——As I arrived I saw a squirming black mass.

Actually, everything past that I don’t really remember.

But I sure not much time passed, then for some reason the birds scattered and flew away. And fortunately, in front of me laid the surprisingly clean corpse of the old woman.

Yes, it was truly fortunate.

Because now I can put the clean old woman in a grave just like how it was in the stories.

As I felt relieved while thinking this. I felt an itch as something passed under my eyes then my cheek and finally reached my chin.

What is this?

Just as I thought this, I placed my hand on my face. It was water.

Was it raining? I honestly didn’t understand what this meant, so I looked up to the sky.

The weather was good. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky above the broken home.

As I tilted my head, this my throat began to shake.

[No…, No…]

Behind my weirdly calm conscience there was someone crying.

That is when I began to realize.

Oh, am I possibly crying? Is this what you call sadness?

When I realized this I finally started to honestly cry my eyes out.

That right. I started to think that maybe this is what the hero from the story felt.

——From then on, I truly became an empty shell.

Even though I was also as it may, and even if the old woman didn’t even recognize me as a person.

Even so I was with someone, and when that person was gone I learned of “loneliness”.

Even though I lost the will to live and yet did not have the courage to die, all I did was aimlessly passed the time until that cold winter night when I met my master.


[—— To you, o’ young child that has been completely abandoned by this world. To you, o’ lost child who no one ones how many more nights more you will see. Take my hand. Offer me your body and become of use to me. —— If you do this, I shall offer you modest salvation.] Granite

There stood a magician who wore a black cape and held a staff with a skull attached to it.

Honestly speaking, even appearing suddenly in front of me I didn’t think the person was scary… at all.

But the word’s that person said, shook my feeling after such a long time.

I was truly surprised at that person who put their hand to me who was filthy.

Even though it’s the first time we’ve met his words were like he could suddenly see through me.

Unlike the other people from outside the slums he held out his hand to me even though I’m dirty.

It was as if he was an evil magician that had come out of a story. But to me who has no connections in this world, “He sought and reached out his hand to someone like me.” this alone made me feel good.

It doesn’t matter what he does to me.

It doesn’t matter if I met some terrible end just like the characters in the stories.

It doesn’t matter if I’m killed.

――Even so, at that point it felt right to give him everything I could.

As I took his hand, the magician had a disturbing smile as he thought of something.

However, the magician was nice to me.

He adjusted the length of his black cape that was still warm and wrapped me in it.

He saw that I was walking barefoot, and he ripped his hood into two and wrapped my feet.

As we made our way to our destination he made sure to match his steps with mine and slowly walked with me.

Of course, this was just him being considerate so his important “material” won’t be damaged.
Since I still had a child’s mind this is the first time someone has shown me good will and not since losing the old women I felt my feelings coming back after such a long, long time.

(TL Note: Basically, Shar here thinks that she will be used in some weird experiment and that is why she talks about herself as a some sort of material.)


We passed some people who looked like they were doing something scary. We then finally reached the magician’s house.

He waved at me to come inside and,

“Ah. Of course, this is what will happen to me”

At that moment I gave up.

All over the room, there were bones that could be seen as coming from a child scattered about.

Inside of the large pot there were human bones floating.

The magician slowly lit a fire underneath that pot.

―― Yeah. From the slums to now I have indeed received enough “salvation”.

In that case, it’s now my turn to give.

As I thought this, I felt refreshed as I made my way to the magician who had turned toward me.
…. No, that was a lie.

Even though I was so scared my body could shake, running from here and I would lose my last connection to anyone then dying all alone was much scarier to me. That’s why I was able to move forward.

As I stood there the magician said finally said his last words to me.

[You will be taught alchemy by ――] Granite


I will have you become a sacrifice, so I can become even greater! Or something like that….

As I was almost brought to tears from the fear I was feeling, I remembered the story of the saint and wanted to be dignified to the end, so I stiffened my face.

But what came next almost knocked me off of my feet.

[You will be taught alchemy by —-. …Ugh…this smell and filth…this is bad…] Granite


Well it’s because I was in a place where I couldn’t afford such luxuries.

Even though I went to the trouble of coming to terms with what was going to happen, I have to be honest and say that me at that time was somewhat annoyed.
This might be the first emotion I remember having.

If you’re going to sacrifice me then hurry about and do it! Even though I’m scared don’t insult me in such a weird way!

I started to have such idiotic thoughts.

From then on since I was too scared, and it was impossible to say this. [My feelings, let them reach the magician!!] as I thought this I stared at the magician’s eyes, he then started to speak.
[First let’s wash your body. Wait a bit.] Granite

I nodded with a stern expression.

As the magician turned his back to me and made his way to a pot in the corner of the room, he returned with something semi-transparent that was squirming and attached to his arm.


I was confused by the disgusting object I’ve seen for the first time. The magician said this.

[Now, please use this. When you become clean you will feel good.] Granite


Use what? That thing? Huh? How?

He said wash? What?

As I opened my eyes wide and started to panic, as the magician pushed the horrifying object toward me as he grinned and said.

[What, you can speak? There is no need to hold back. After having Pochi eat the dirt off of you, the refreshed feeling you will experience is something you can’t get anywhere else. Come now.] Granite


Even as my heart screamed out my body would no longer move as I wished.

[Fue?!……ah…..!?!?! ]

As the slimy object entered the black cloak that the magician had given me, even though I had clothes on underneath it started to cling to all the parts of my body except my face. It started to crawl all over my body like a work and suck on my skin.

[!?!? Ahh!]

Without thinking I squatted down and started to scream.

The magician completely ignored me and moved to a different shelf and started rummaging around.

Oh, I don’t care anymore just hurry up and sacrifice me already!!

As I started to want to cry I started to say this, but all the came out of my mouth was the screams from having my skin rubbed and sucked on.


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CH 4 – “Aiming to be a Solider” – Reincarnated as a Dark Elf ~The strongest magician conquers a parallel world~

(TL Note: Someone mentioned how short the chapters were. I’m not cutting them up the author just tends to write like this.)

As 4 years passed, Celica Desself became old enough to be called a young girl.
She was under 140 centimeters tall but for a girl of her age this was normal. (TL Note: Around 4 ½ feet tall for us Americans.)

But, elves don’t usually grow up to be very tall, so there is a possibility that she won’t grow to be any taller than this.

Even though she is a bit worried about this, height does not equal strength, so she decided to not worry about it.

The strength Celica is aiming for isn’t brute strength, but political strength that can subdue many people and leadership strength. This the kind of strength that she yearns for.

Height has nothing to do with this.
That is why a body larger than this is not necessary.
There is no reason to grow any taller than this.
What she needs now more than anything is a light to brighten her future.
How will she take over this world? That is all that is going through her head.
God told her to take over this world.
She was tasked with becoming the dictator of this world.
And she intends to follow this command.

Ever since being reborn into this world, establishing herself and obtaining her place in this world was a given.

Laws like human rights haven’t taken root yet here as in her previous world.
To guarantee her health and happiness, she needs power.

In order to obtain this, instead of becoming a land baron or a rich merchant by making complicated plans, it’s better to aim for the top of this country, no the world.

If I take over the top, then at least I won’t be attacked from the people there.

There is no reason for Celica to be troubled by inept bosses here in this world as she was in her previous one.

Even though reaching the top is the best environment, it is impossible to achieve this overnight. For such a careful plan a thousand days’ worth of planning is needed.

Consequently, ever since she was born into this world, Celica has thought of only how obtain power.

Living in her previous world was easy.
All you needed to do was get good grades on paper tests, get into a good school, and get into a good company.
And if you do this, no matter how inept you may be, you are promised a good life.

Another way to think of it is if you are capable, a child from a poor home can become a politician, or an entrepreneur.

Depending on your talents, you can deal with it.
But this parallel world is different.
This world’s cultural level is low.
Your station in society is fixated.
The child of a farmer will become a farmer. The child of a bricklayer will become a bricklayer, just the same as a child of a noble will become a noble.
Social classes are fixated and not fluid.
How can you make something of yourself in a world like this?
Celica worried over this since she was young and after coming this far, she has collected her thoughts.

[I have no choice but to become a soldier.] Celica.

This is the only conclusion she could come to.
Being a career officer is the only way for a poor person to succeed in life.

Your station in life is fixated in this world, but only soldiers can break through this.

Of course, even though there are enough idiotic sons of nobles to shake a stick at in the upper echelons of the army. There are also many capable poor people there as well.

This is the kind of world Celica is in. Especially this country who is surrounded by enemies on all sides. If the soldiers were not capable, the country itself would not be able to remain intact.

It’s natural that eventually this country would recognize true strength.

[Well luckily this world has the general notion of magic. And I have this tremendous magic power and my intellect. If I can just get into a military school, then I can somehow make it work.] Celica

This wasn’t an exaggeration or prideful boasting, only the simple truth.

The only problem is how I would get into the military school.

At the military academy if you are skilled you can receive a scholarship, but that hurdle is without a doubt difficult to overcome.

It seems you must enter a military elementary school and attain excellent marks.
The problem is how will I enter such a facility?

Of course, with careful planning and preparation to enter the school at a young age, she stuffed this world’s common sense and education into her head. Even then there was information that Celica was unable to easily attain.

This is due to fact that Celica is a girl.

Military Elementary School has a fixed number of applicants. And entering as a girl is quite difficult.

Even if the army recognizes true strength, that’s only when it comes to men. For women, it’s still very difficult.

In the middle of being impoverished due to war, the army probably finds little merit in raising female soldiers.

If there is time to do that, then it’s better to raise girls to be good wives who will protect the home and have many children is better for the country.

Honestly, what an archaic way of thinking. But it is a logical in a way, so I have to at least acknowledge it.

[Even if I acknowledge it that doesn’t mean I have to agree with it.] Celica

Now after becoming a girl, there has been no greater hurdle than this.
At least let there be an exception for a genius like me.

Even if I grabbed the emperor and prime minister by the back of their necks and demanded change, there is little that can be done.

Celica began to realistically plan how she would enter that school.

This place recognizing true strength and being practical are points that will work in my favor.

What I laid my eyes on was the newspaper that was lying in front of me. Made from high-class paper, it was the St. Elfshizum times.

(TL Note: サン・エルフシズム is the name and I had to make up the spelling for this word. I apologize if it looks dumb.)

There was a cute girl on the front page.
This cute girl is my key to entering the academy.
Celica whispered the name of the child who will become her meal ticket.

[The 27th Emperor Lambert Von Grantz’s 4th princess Lunelize.]

She is the girl who will help Celica get onto to the track to success.


[Previous] [Next]


CH 3 – “Admiring Airships” – Reincarnated as a Dark Elf ~The strongest magician conquers a parallel world~

TL Note: Once again the author switches from 3rd person the 1st person like crazy.

My mother had become a widow due to a sudden fire.


As stupid as it may be she loved that man, for a while she became lifeless and some time was necessary to regain our normal lives back.


During this time, Celica played the role of a dutiful daughter.


At the very least, she hid the fact that she was a rebellious daughter who killed her own father.


Celica interacted with her mother with a smile and cheerfully comforted her.


[It’s ok. I’m fine with father being gone. Even with father gone, I will protect mother in his place.] Celica


There was no lie in those words, she had been protecting her mother from the shadows. For as long as she lives, her mother will never realize this.


When the money from the insurance, that her mother was sure had never been set up, came in she didn’t even doubt it for a second.


[This has to be a gift from God. We have to use it carefully.] Celica


With a smile appropriate for her age she said,

[…You’re right. It must be that Celica has been such a good girl that God gave us this money in order to protect you.] Mother


With that, she accepted the unnatural event as an act of God.


Honestly, this woman has no concept of doubting people.


That’s why she was wrapped up with that deadbeat, and gave birth to a devil like daughter.


Since she gave birth to me, karma wise she has to take responsibility until the very end. Until she grows up a bit more, I intend to be raised.


In order to accomplish this, I need my mother to forget that bastard and get back on her feet as soon as possible.


Celica devoted herself to supporting her, and waited for her mother to return to normal.


For her mother to calm down and to forget that deadbeat half a year was needed.


During this time, she quit her job at the factory, and she recovered at home. But now there is no need to worry. She will need to make back the amount of money she has used up until now. Although, she was never fit to work at such a severe workplace like a factory in the first place. I went around with my mother realizing and found her a comparatively easier housekeeper position.



In short, she needs to find a maid job, so I nonchalantly placed a job flyer on the table.


She worried if she would be hired, but I would not give her the time to entertain such thoughts. A good job like this will quickly be filled.


[I’m sure mother can do it. And, I want to see mother in a maid outfit.] Celica


As if giving her backside a good slap, I said this. I made her wear some clothes a noble would like and sent her off to the interview. My mother safely finished the interview and got the job. She was as giddy as a child. Honestly, what a simple girl.


As I thought this, watching the elf girl, no, my mother being happy for some reason my chest began to become itchy and I felt restless.


My mother took to the housekeeping job like a fish to water, and extended her employment there. Her pay quickly rose and was eventually promoted to the head maid position.


My mother, who was a widow, was receiving a good wage and with her daughter was able to live comfortably while affording some luxuries.


Although, with this parallel world’s culture not being that advanced, the luxuries available are limited.


On the weekends, the mother and daughter going to a cafe for a light meal was the most luxury they could afford.


Besides this, The fish and chips the mother and daughter ate was quite delicious.


I, Celica Desself, spent her early childhood years thusly.


Now, I did declare that the culture had not advanced, but allow me to further explain about this world’s culture a bit.


Since I am to live in this world from now on, I must accurately gather information about this place.


Let’s accumulate all the information I’ve gathered since I’ve become an infant. First, this is a fantasy world. It is your standard parallel world. There are humans, elves, and dwarves.


Even though there is magic, this is not a magic and sword world. No, swords still play a big part in this world, but guns have already made their appearance, and the main fighting in the battlefield is starting move from swords to guns


The cultural level of this world, if compared to my previous life, is that of right before World War 1. Tanks have yet to appear, so foot soldiers and cavalry still make up the fighting force. The stars of the battlefield are the magic soldiers, that straddle a large gun barrel and fly about in the sky.


The point is that in this world, just like my previous one, instead of the cultural level progressing the military technology has advanced in a misshapen way.


Honestly, no matter what world it is, humans are the same.


Nothing but shit.


As I thought this, I looked out of the window. There an airship was floating. That is this world’s most advanced technology. By the way, I made a promise with mother to let me ride one next week. I unknowingly was swinging my legs that were dangling from the chair excitedly. This might be proof at how much I was looking forward to it, then I recollected myself.


[Even though I am not a little girl, why am I happy about such a thing.] Celica


In the end, I am only riding an airship to measure the level of culture of this world. As I tell myself this, I can’t seem to calm my restless heart.



CH 3 – “Slime” – The Deadbeat Master and Genius Disciple’s Misunderstood Workshop

(TL Note: Besides the name Shalltear I feel like the author is once again referencing Overlord with this chapter.)

In order to hide the dirty child with truly impressive green eyes, I had no choice, even though I was completely against it, but to share the black robe I was wearing. As I was enduring the cold, that felt like it had dropped to near zero now, I made my way to the street where my workshop is located.

Yeah, today is really cold.

I can’t believe people are actually enjoying a festival on a night like this, they must be off their rocker.

….It’s not like I’m saying this because I’m upset that I can’t join them.

On the street where my workshop is, there is probably another name that has been decided administratively. My street is also known as “Fool’s Street”, this name which can only been seen as harassment is what my street is called. Basically, it’s a place that is disorderly like some seedy downtown back alley.

Well, instead of disorderly I think chaotic would be a better fit.

There are normal homes and there is a long bar randomly placed along the street, there is an old woman who sells vegetables from her kitchen garden, and there is a store calling itself a weapon shop that only sells kitchen knives and nails. There is also an alchemist, who won’t move or take orders unless he’s out of money. Even though the rent being cheap is good, there are many people who would go out of business in other locations, that flock to this place

Even there is no need to say it, the last person was me.

Even though we all there it’s not like we are very close, besides the old lady gardener, everyone thinks they are better than everyone else.

Even the circular neighborhood notice, that is supposed to go around to everyone, has stopped at someone’s shop and hasn’t been seen for a couple of months. But, even the simple action of checking who has it is something no one here has the intention of doing.

And here I am relieved that I made my way back to this street.

As to why, well the people who live here won’t bat an eye at the small black figure walking next to me, this is without a doubt.

Actually, on the way here there were some drunk idiots who were dancing, as if a part of some evil summoning ritual. And those idiots didn’t pay me a single mind.

Instead, the black figure next to me was surprised and began to shake. Well, this child will get used to this street soon enough…

—-Finally, we reached the entrance of my workshop, after opening the door and looking inside, I slammed it shut after 5 seconds.

Ugh, Damn it. I forgot to clean up.

Skulls. Skulls. Skulls.

There were skulls strewn throughout the room, there were even skulls floating in my alchemy pot. Even I was disturbed by the scene inside.

A large pot, big enough to boil a dead body, just like what’s in a ritual area used by a necromancer performing some questionable magical ritual.

Before I left, I was hyping myself up way too much earlier.

Well, I should say that if I didn’t hype myself up earlier, I wouldn’t have been able to go to such a dangerous place like the slums at night.

And because of that, the very thought of cleaning up disappeared from my mind.

…Also I should add this just to be sure, the skulls are not real. By placing animal bones and stones in the alchemy pot and melting them, I performed a basic technique called image projection to create the skulls. These are not human bones.

Well now, what should I do.

Is it OK to go inside just like this?

After worrying for several seconds in front of the door, the cold began to seep into my flesh and bones and even thinking became troublesome. Whatever happens, happens.

If it’s this much, then I’ll just have the kid come in and the kid will understand after I explain, probably.

If I stay outside I don’t even want to open my mouth. God, it’s cold.

As the door opened with loud creak, I invited the dark figure inside. I then hurriedly made my way to the alchemy pot and poured some magic power in, I will use this instead of a fireplace to warm up the place.

As I finished this, I once again turned to the door and saw the child had slightly stuck their head out of the dark robe, the face there was emotionless as usual.

[…….] Granite

The child silently stared at me, then the skulls around the room, and then the alchemy pot producing heat. Soon enough, the child started to slowly make their way toward where I was standing.

Oh? This kid isn’t as freaked out as I thought they would be.

As to be expected from a child from the slums, they are mentally tough.

I guess I can skip my explanation, huh?

I immediately began to explain my plans to the child walking toward me.

[You will be taught alchemy by —-. …Ugh…this smell and filth…this is bad…] Granite

As I opened my mouth, my senses were attacked by the horrible filth and stench coming from this child that had permeated the room. I made a face without thinking.

Then I suddenly remembered, I looked down at my own hands which had touched the child’s hands earlier and they were black with dirt.

….It will be better if I wash my hands first.

After this I will need to feed this kid something.

If I take a good look, this kid is nothing but skin and bones. Well that is to be expected.

As I thought of this, I looked at the child who was looking up at me without batting an eye, I once again called out to the child that was being obedient although a bit creepy.

[First, let’s wash your body. Wait a bit.] Granite

Here in this alchemist workshop that is my home, when you need to clean something really dirty I have something special just for such an occasion.

—- That’s right. With a gelatinous body, a living organism that can adapt to any environment. Long story short, I’m talking about a slime.

Especially when you are dirty, using a slime is considered normal among alchemists.

No amount of soap will fully clean this child, and if you properly train a slime they will listen to a human’s commands.

So, after I came to this natural conclusion, I turned my back to the child who had slightly nodded and as I made my way to the slime jar; I decided to seriously go over the techniques dealing with slimes…

The relationship between slimes and alchemy is quite old.

Well actually slimes having such a weird nature is why alchemy gave birth to techniques that can change the appearance of objects. I don’t think this is me just exaggerating.

Slimes are a species that start from eating plants and animals and then go to ores and any inorganic substance, they truly can ingest anything. Slimes then take the plants they’ve ingested and following their own biological rules, physically and magically change to adapt to their environment, this power is what makes up their special characteristics

The first alchemist, using the slimes special characteristics, instead of using an alchemy pot used “slimes who had just split off from another slime” and by feeding them medical herbs created healing potions. This was where it all began.

When I was still in training, I really don’t remember ever seriously training though, I was immediately taught how to handle slimes.

It’s just the same as blacksmiths learning how to control a fire and magicians learning how to use catalysts.

Well, leaving the actual synthesizing to the slimes you know, seemed to match my nature. And honestly instead of doing synthesizing in an alchemy pot, it was better having the slimes do it.

Well with a low-level alchemist such as myself there is scant difference between a slime and myself, but this is something I will never say out loud.

Now of course even I have slime as a partner and its name is Pochi.

(TL Note: This is an average name for dogs in Japan kind of like rex or fido.)

Regarding the name, well let’s just say I wasn’t the one who named it and I’ll omit the rest.

As I arrived at the slime jar I put my hand out to squirming Pochi, and as my hands were cleaned Pochi crawled up my arm.

Pochi must have been happy I was paying attention to it, Pochi was jiggling and looked really cute.

Ah, let me just say this, it’s not like I have some special liking for this, for alchemists this is a natural feeling.

Then as Pochi was crawling up my arm, I made my way back to the dirty child and said this.

[Now, please use this. When you become clean you will feel good.] Granite

[……..Huh?] Shar


This child’s green eyes that up until now had been emotionless opened wide, and this is the first time the child spoke with a cracking voice.

[What, you can speak? There is no need to hold back. After having Pochi eat the dirt off you, the refreshed feeling you will experience is something you can’t get anywhere else. Come now.] Granite

As I said this, I pushed Pochi toward the child.

[Fue?!……ah…..!?!?! ] Shar

Pochi happily jumped to the feast in front of it (the dirty child’s body), then Pochi spread itself inside of the black rob that the child was still wearing.

Uh huh, I will be at ease, Pochi will have a good meal, and this slum child will be thoroughly cleaned.

This is what you would call a win-win, right?

As I thought this, I nodded to myself satisfied.


[N,No! Master, please don’t remember any more than that!! That was very, very embarrassing!!] Shar


With her hands clasped at her chest, Shar is appealing to me with a bright red face. And I being childish and wanting to get back at her, started to speak while laughing to myself.

[Why is there a need to act so embarrassed. Shalltear, when it comes to washing your body besides using soap using a slime is not weird in the slightest. At that time, all I did was try to clean the horrible filth that was on your body using the common sense that is known to alchemists. Shar, even now, don’t you have a slime named “Lucolu” that you go into the bath together, right?] Granite (TL Note: The name is from a hair salon chain in Japan.)

[Um, well. I’m sorry if it looks like I’m protesting, but! Now and back then are two different stories! It is true that now I don’t feel embarrassed or anything and I am used to it… but back then, you know, because I was surprised by everything! …N,Now that I think back to that time, that slime was master’s slime so…..] Shar

[Hahaha, I see I see. Your master was teasing you a bit. Let’s move on with our reminiscing.] Granite

[U, Uhn! Master, I understand. I won’t h,hate you but I am very mad!] Shar

I started to chuckle again as shar said this while pouting.

(From the Author) The fact that the whole setting of the slime was made only for the female alchemist, Shar, is a secret. (LoL, but seriously if Shar became dark then the whole story would become dark so there was no other way!!! The author is not at fault!).

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CH 2 – “An Encounter on a Winter’s Night ” – The Deadbeat Master and Genius Disciple’s Misunderstood Workshop

(Translator’s Note: This author and his weird way of writing will be the death of me.)

It happened 5 years ago, just as the first cold streak hit one winter’s night.

[Damn, the concept of work should just disappear from this world. Ah~~~ I don’t want to work~~~. Generally speaking, why is that you can’t get money if you don’t work. Isn’t that strange? There is something wrong with the world. A revolution is necessary. I won’t do it, but can someone do it for me, please?] Granite

This is how I spent my days grumbling away, at this time I was 27 years old and still an active alchemist. Here I am on the very outskirts of the capital, in a place commonly known as the slum district. I am creeping along like some sort of burglar.

–No, even if I say I look like a burglar from someone else’s perspective I probably look like some sort of “evil magician”, “black market dealer”, or “an alchemist that has used the taboo arts”.

A black cloak and hood completely covered my body, and in one hand I held an alchemy staff that was decorated with a skull…is what I wanted the rod I had to look like. Well the additions to that staff were difficult…. I remember it took almost three days.

As I was heading to a place that is far away from the main district of the capital, consequently the number of street lights gradually deceased. Even the stars were hidden behind thick clouds in the sky and the moon itself was hidden.
Now large snowflakes that showed no sign of sticking began to fall, a cold wind passed through the narrow street causing me to shake uncontrollably.
The only sound that could be heard, beside the wind, was the creaking of the gradually dirty worn-down roofs of the surrounding buildings. Even before I reached the slum district, where the lowest in the caste system lives in an area that has had development stopped, a depressing atmosphere surrounded the area.

As my surroundings gave off the feeling as if monsters had invaded, at that time I, who already couldn’t freely move due to the cold, found my body began to stiffen.

Alchemy Staff.
A handy self-protection tool used by alchemists, it can release the energy of a single action that has been put inside of it beforehand.
The output can be greatly affected but the creator’s skill and finances used. It is superior against magician in terms of invocation speed and is superior to melee fighters in terms of reach. I should have saved after abstaining from drinking for a month. It’s better to make a proper staff then just having some knockoff by my side, as I do now.

Without thinking I admitted to my own laziness in an instance, even such a simple action was out of the norm for me. This is the second time tonight this has happened, and I haven’t even reached the slum district yet.

[Still,…maybe I should come back another day… It’s cold…and creepy… It might be smart for me to strategically retreat from here…Right? No, I can’t. Knowing me, if I leave now I’ll never come back to a place like this. I must find a someone here who no one will miss, a person that will be my meal ticket… The deadbeat comfortable lifestyle of my dreams is within my grasp…!] Granite

Of course, after 5 years have passed and with everything that has happened until now, looking back my “good plan” seems more of a “shit plan”; yet my past self still clung to that plan. As I hurriedly moved forward into the dark streets I looked like a creepy army alchemist who mass produces homunculus.

(TL Note: Shou Tucker from full metal alchemist, creepy as hell. Never forget Nina and her big dog…)

—Also, I have to finish this tonight.

My past self muttered this.

Tonight, the guards in charge of patrolling the capitol will be stationed at more important areas this evening.
Tonight, is the festival celebrating the princess turning 10 years old. The fact that her body is weak is widely known through the town. Among the merchants that I often deal with as an alchemist, those parasite pieces of garbage secretly bet every year whether the princess will celebrate “another” birthday or not, what a tragic princess.

Every year on the princess’s birthday, the royal family takes a large amount of finances from the treasury and celebrates in a grandiose manner.

Of course, for the peasants, it doesn’t matter if the princess is awake or in a coma.
The populace of the capitol is doing nothing but enjoying the grand festival and drinking all night long.
So, the guards who defend the peace of the capitol will be patrolling the important areas of the capitol that are more likely to have incidents occur.

….In addition to that, the people who live in the slum district don’t even have the money to enjoy the festival, so all of this has nothing to do with them.
By the way, even though I might be a bit better off, even if it tried to play it cool and say, “I don’t carry spending money” is my motto; I’m still living day by day. I am in no place to talk about other people…

As I stared at my current surroundings with a sense of fear, I stiffened my body against the cold and such sad thoughts ran through my head as I continued forward.

—Then I finally set foot in the slum district.

If I were to sum up the slum district in a couple of words, it would be a garbage dump.
Compared to the previous district I was in when I was worrying about my safety, at least people still lived there so it was a much more luxurious place compared to the slums. This is what I thought.

As a rotten smell rose to my nose, I noticed the remains of excrement around the area.
Despite this there wasn’t any garbage to be found on the twisting roads that make up the slum district, and not even a single blade of grass could be found growing on the street. As I took one more look around, if you could ignore the stench and the contents of the gutters you would think this was a properly maintained area

I could sparsely see abandoned buildings even in this darkness. There were structures made of only pillars and walls that couldn’t be called abandoned buildings littered around area, like gravestones.
I’m sure the inside of these structures did not have what would normally be considered a room.
Because of this a crying voice carried by the wind could be heard, a voice that was filled with resentment and sadness.

—As the cowardly I arrived at this place, I finally realized just how foolish my thoughts had been and feelings of guilt washed over me. Also, I started to feel afraid as if I had stepped into some magical territory full of monsters.

Even though I am a plain mediocre alchemist, no matter what I am still an alchemist.

That means in short, based on the world’s hierarchy I fall into the lower stratum of the intellectual class.
Then as far as I know the country I was born in has a affluential good government compared to our surrounding countries.

There is war. And my country does fight often.
Our country’s army is powerful, and we rarely lose any conflicts.
Even though there is some government propaganda, I am aware of it. That’s why I didn’t think that there would be such a dark side to the country here in the very center of the country, the capital, and not somewhere in a faraway town.

The reason for my mediocrity is not just my personality, but my lack of imagination can also be noted as being at fault.

I just particularly don’t want to work. I don’t feel bothered thinking this way. And I think that’s that.
But even with that, I am not sure what I am trying to do now will pay out in the long run. This is what I started to think.

Setting several steps into the slum district, after uncharacteristically seriously thinking; I regrettably arrived at a conclusion.
This is a bad habit of mine. I am normally very selfish but when it comes down to the wire, I am a coward.
Ahh, I should have had a stiff drink before coming here, this is so lame.

[…I should head home.] Granite

I nodded to myself starting to head in the opposite way and go back home to my stuffy workshop.

—Then, I had a stroke of luck, is what I could say.

As I was about to abandon my nice idea and head home, I heard a small voice that was like a gospel to my ears.

It was a person, and most likely a child.

And a coughing sound could be heard.

It was close, down this alleyway that is 70 cenmeterus (centimeters) wide.

After hearing that sound, I quickly had a change of heart, and the conclusion I came to earlier was forgotten as I calmed down.

[Are you serious..? Is this the heavens telling me to go through with my nice idea? Well let’s not worry about logic and the small details. Yeah. Those are the worries of important nobles who are involved with the politics of this country. Haha, just a little more until my deadbeat dream lifestyle is within reach.]

As I was smiling while in high spirits, I hurriedly made my way through the streets….then I came to my senses.

Wait?… Kids for the slums are known for being greedy…. I’m not going to get beaten up and stripped of all my belongings, will I?
That is troubling. A refined alchemist such as my self is not suited for such violence.

Well in case of such an event I went to the trouble of preparing my bluff of an alchemy staff and black robe.

I massaged my hands that had gone numb from the cold before I entered the alley. Last night I had practiced how to make a scary face and I grumbled to myself as I read a magic tome of curses; I thought of some intimidating phrases and repeated them in my head.

Then after a while after I decided I was fully prepared, I made my way to the direction where the voice had come from, all while shaking on the inside.

Now will an ogre or a basilisk come out. Even though I was over-exaggerating as I thought this, I continued forward.

(TL Note: This is Japanese saying that originally goes, will a demon or a snake come out? It means you never know what will happen.)

After sluggishly going about 10+ meterus (meters) I found a young child shaking wearing in worn-out clothes that made a prisoner’s uniform look good and had wrapped themselves in a blanket that was as dirty as a cleaning rag.

Just then at that moment, the thick clouds had cleared, and the pair of white and blue moons showed up directly above the alleyway.

In that cold moonlight, as if from a scene in a play the alleyway was brightly lit up.
The child there heard my footsteps and raised their dirt covered face. There all I saw was a pair of desolate green eyes staring at me.

——Before I could even think how sad this child was, I shook in fear.

Those eyes were as deep as a bottomless pit.
Overcoming all of the fake bravado and bluffs I had prepared, there that child was truly disturbing.
A demon or evil ghost would surely retreat in front of this child.
I thought such idiotic ideas where nothing but an undeniable truth at that time.

I was so scared that I didn’t know what I was afraid of and as I was absorbed in these feelings the lines I had practiced in my head flowed from my mouth.

[—— To you, o’ young child that has been completely abandoned by this world. To you, o’ lost child who no one ones how many more nights more you will see. Take my hand. Offer me your body and become of use to me. —— If you do this, I shall offer you modest salvation.] Granite

And unexpectedly, I repeated the lines I took from an old demon contract. While illuminated in moonlight, I stretched out my hand while the child slightly widened their eyes.

The child showed no other emotions and just stared at me with a blank expression.
The child in front of my eyes slowly stood up and took my hand.

The child’s hand was cold due to the temperature outside.
But that hand that was still warmer then the outside temperature, belonged to just a child and not some sort of demon. As my past self finally acknowledged the person in front of me as just a child, I was relieved.


This was the moment that I, Granite Range, and the girl who still had no name, Shalltear Range, met.

—— It was at this time that while feeling relieved I, who is usually careless, forgot something important.

What expression did I have when I first confronted her?
On top of that, what lines did I use to persuade her?
Then finally, How did I look in her eyes at that moment?

—— Because of this, even though Shar never showed this in her expressions, I made her come to a great resolution.


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CH 2 – “Patricide” – Reincarnated as a Dark Elf ~The strongest magician conquers a parallel world~

Author’s Note: this story will be told in the 3rd person.

Translator’s Note: The author switched from 3rd person to 1st person so much I had a hard time translating this. So, for the sake of my sanity I will be switching between the two throughout this chapter.

I will punish my father.

That was a decision I swore to when I was a baby and now that I am a young child this has not changed.

By chance, if he had made up with my mother or had any sliver of goodness left in him, but after waiting 4 years my father did not reform.

No, in fact my father’s domestic violence worsened. With an increase in the amount he drank, the times when my once beautiful mother wasn’t covered in bruises became few and far between. This can no longer be left unattended. This is what I thought. This wasn’t just for my mother but also for myself. Being left in this kind of environment there is no way my future plans of conquest will come to fruition. I have to do something about the dangers surrounding me. Since my father would barely work, my mother left the house to work in his place. At these times, my father would be home drowning in liquor. He gathered his gambling friends and drank at home.

That alone necessitates a death sentence, yet among his gambling friends a pedophile seems to have snuck in, I have no other choice now.

That disgusting perverted bastard has set his eyes on Celica Desself, the young girl who is growing more beautiful day by day, in other words me.

He is looking at me in a lustful way. It is truly repulsive. And the thing that is even more repulsive is that my father is shouldering a large debt with that disgusting bastard.

I don’t even need to tell you the answer, do I? Basically, it is that.

One day, after confirming my mom was working that night and wasn’t home, that bastard came into Celica’s room.

[Honestly, what feeble minded inferior people] Cecilia

As this was thought, those men didn’t hear a thing. As to why, about this time those men were covered in flames. Celica brought down the hammer of justice on them by using her pervious life’s knowledge.

Yes, using the phenomenon called “backdraft” Celica blew away and burned to death the two men who had evil intentions.

[It went easier than I thought.] Cecilia

Celica plainly said this while looking up at the smoke that was leaking from the blown-out window.

The old ladies from the neighborhood said,

[It’s hard, I know. But it’s ok now, we called your mom who had gone to work.]

As they hugged me I wondered if they knew? They had no idea of the fact that the young girl in front of them mercilessly killed her father and his friend. Also, that the girl they were currently holding was coldly doing monetary calculations in her head.

[ Now, Dryad Insurance Company will payout 100 gold coins for the fire insurance. And the life insurance of my father, whose signature I forged, will have a payout of 100 gold coins. If 100 gold coins has the same value as 10 million yen (TL Note: around $100,000) from my previous life then it’s 20 million yen. Then my mother needs to also start earning 150 thousand yen (TL Note: around $15,000) a year.]

She whispered to herself. Now we need to look for a new house; how can I live comfortably? This is what the girl was thinking at that time.

Naturally with the parasite that was her father out of the picture and on top of that the recent windfall of 20 million yen, the mother and daughter’s life will no doubly become easier.

Now her mother won’t be hit. Even that alone was enough for her. The young girl who was making these devilish calculations was called out to by God.

[You are indeed a rare find that’s beyond my expectations.] God

Celica replied to that sarcasm thusly.

[By the way God, there is something I wish to ask you.] Celica

[What? Do you want to know if there is a hell in this world too?] God

[If there is then I will definitely wind up there. But, I didn’t want to ask about that.] Celica

[Then, what do you want to ask?] God

[I want to know if life insurance is exempt from taxes in this world. Depending on the answer my future plans will change.] Celica

As God heard this he replied without answering my question.

[I don’t know anything about that, all I know is that hell would indeed be lukewarm for you.] God

[Well thank you for that.] Celica

Celica said this while she smiled with a grin.


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CH 1 – “Dark Elf Baby” – Reincarnated as a Dark Elf ~The strongest magician conquers a parallel world~

Translator’s Note: I don’t share the author’s feelings he has for women that he writes in this chapter.

Thus, I was reincarnated as a dark elf. In addition to that I became a woman.

Being frail and incompetent, an existence that is the most despised in this world. I have been reincarnated as a female.

What is the reason for this? I must have committed some serious sin, I cannot help but think so. But, it’s not as if me worrying will somehow grow a penis in my crotch. It’s not like my gender will change. I will accept my own gender. I will accept my circumstances. I have no choice but to admit that I have become a dark elf girl. Running away from reality will only have me swept away by fate. Besides become a girl, that alone I cannot accept. So, I will watch and observe my surroundings. I can see the ceiling. It seems I have been laid in a baby’s bed. It seems that this world has baby beds, and its culture has advanced enough to have light bulbs.

There is a suspended light bulb hanging in mid-air.

(I heard it was a parallel world, but it doesn’t seem to be a world of swords and magic…)

No, it’s still to early to come to any conclusions. Even though the light bulb is shiningly brightly, there is no evidence that its being lit with electricity. There is a high chance that something like magic is lighting the bulb. This is a parallel world. My own common sense cannot decide this.

(But, it is quite annoying. Being a baby and all…)

An adult would just check the bulb and that would be then end of that.
This is irritating. I screamed.

(God! This is annoying! Move time forward until I am more of an adult)

As I screamed, God answered.

[That is possible, but wait a bit more. First, understand where you have been placed. Also remembering the details of being a baby is not a normal experience someone has. It is a bit fortunate to experience it.] God


I wanted to spit after hearing that response but that is all I can do now. Shit, besides that, I’ve been feeling the urge to pee. What should I do? As I asked God this, he replied coldly.

[If you’re a baby then wet yourself. Pissing is a baby’s job.] God

[W,What? Are you telling me to soil myself?!?]


Its humiliating and a disgrace. But, it’s all I can do. Now, I am powerless. Even if I open my mouth, all I can do is cry aloud. I can’t even stand up. Besides my crotch is covered in a diaper. So, what I mean is that. I’m sorry to say, I soiled myself. I cursed God himself.

[God should just blow up]

As I ended with that, my mother came running in. It seems she heard me crying. My mother who is beautiful enough to be an elf said,

[What’s wrong Celica? Ababoo.] (TL note: baby talk)

With those words I discovered 2 things, one that my mother is a person full of affection and two my own name. The former is fine but the latter? Celica? Why must I have to bear having such a weak sounding name. Even though I feel indignant, I couldn’t show it through my actions. All I am now is a weak baby that can only cry and wet herself. It will take some time before I am able to express myself.

I grew up to be 1 years old. In that time, I experienced what it’s like to be a baby but nothing interesting occurred not even once. All I did everyday was suck on my mother’s teat and cry. Even though all I was doing was just crying every day, I am the one that felt the most dejected. I wondered if anything would change. As I wished for this, one day something happened. It wasn’t a good changed. If anything, it was a bad change.

After I had become able to understand my mother’s words then one day I heard her argue with a man.


[W,What? I have never cheated. The only one I love is you.] Mother
[I can’t trust what you say.] Man
[How can you say that?] Mother


If you just take that part, then it sounds like some young lover’s quarrel. The worst came with what was said next.


[…I cannot trust you. You were unfaithful.] Man
[Unfaithful? What? I have never done such a thing.] Mother
[Even I want to believe you. But, I cannot. Whenever I look at that baby’s skin, I am tormented.] Man


That baby must be me. I looked at my own hand. It is true that my hand was a darkish color. My father must be questioning that. I immediately guessed what it is.


[No matter how you look at it that child is a dark elf. I am a human. You are an elf. And yet how can a dark elf child be born.] Man
[W,Well…] Mother


My mother was hard pressed to answer. You could see sadness in her eyes.

During this year, after being in contact with my mother, it is true that this female elf is a simple woman; yet she would never cheat on someone.

She isn’t the sort of bitch that would sleep with another man. Then she must have been violated by some dark elf. No, that has to be wrong as well. Probably, my mother had a distant ancestor that was a dark elf. My skin becoming this dark was probably due to atavism. But, in this parallel world atavism is probably not widely known. Honestly, what a poorly developed country. As say such harsh words, I have no intent on improving the situation. Day by day, my skin darkens. My father saw this and was troubled, so he became ill. Then, he started to look at me as if I was garbage. Of course, marital relations also came to a close.

Before long, my father would not come home. Even when he came home he was piss drunk and would hit my mother.

Every day she would cry at my bedside, my mother would weep. Honestly, I want everyone to be more considerate of the environment of a growing child. As I cursed both God ad my mother, I made a decision.


[Well then, this will be my first trial in a parallel world. First, let’s try to save this woman.] Celica


Even though I haven’t any familial feelings for my sleazebag of a father, I do not feel the same way to my mother.

I am in debt for when she breastfed me. I also have to thank her for changing my diapers. After arriving at this conclusion, I called out to God.


[God, please advance time now!] Celica

And God responded in turn.

[No problem, How far do you want to advance?] God
[Ah, yes. Advance to a point where I am old enough to punish that good for nothing.] Celica
[I understand.] God


God responded simply and advanced time until I was 5 years old.

After becoming 5 years old, I muttered to myself
[Oh, even with going forward in time I still gain the experience and memories. This is quite convenient.] As I said this I looked at my 5-year-old body.

I looked at the mirror in my room. Far be it for me to say, but the appearance in the mirror was beautiful enough to be called divine.

It’s hard to believe that this young child would later punish her father without any hesitation.


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CH 1 – “Mornin’” – The Deadbeat Master and Genius Disciple’s Misunderstood Workshop

Translator’s note: The author is incapable of writing a normal sentence everything has to be explained with the detail of Shakespeare on LCD laced Cocaine.

When a fish that is lazily swimming in the ocean depths suddenly meets a sea monster. I wonder what is the fish thinking.

When a squirrel bewitched by the smell of the tree’s fruit climb’s down and while stuffing its cheeks sees the gleaming eyes of a predator hiding in a dark bush. I wonder what is the squirrel thinking.

I, known as Granite Range, declare that I can clearly imagine the mental state of those cute, weak animals.

Among the thousands of case files between Shar and I, after the incident an elixir that came from a reckless remark, the studio where Shar and I lived transformed from a single house into became a mansion….why did this happen?

It’s noon at a certain mansion that was recently remodeled.

Going from a worn-out futon that I spread out on a wooden board, I now sleep in heavenly comfort in an expensive bed made from the feathers of a bird of paradise.
In addition, as I was sleeping in comfortably past noon I felt the presence of that and my body started to shake.

As I quickly regained conscience I tried to search the room with my amateur senses.


There is someone here. Even an amateur like me can feel their stare.
Even though I know if I open my eyes that person will be there, they have erased any presence and are watching me completely silent.

A nihilistic smile welled in my heart.

This person has yet again improved their skills….Hmph as to be expected of my disci…….

………Like hell!!!

I did say to leave me be when I sleep, but I didn’t mean this!
This is just plain scary! God dammit!

Having the problem child reminding me of her excellence first thing in the morning, I warily opened my eyes slowly.
Then just as I thought, I made eye contact with Shar who was loitering near my pillow and staring at me with her green eyes.





As I opened my eyes, she had a cheerful smile covering her whole face.
But, she was mumbling like a new born chick waiting for me to greet her.

……Yeah. I know. I understand.
I know Shar is not trying to scare me or anything like that.

She is just waiting for “her great master that she loves so much” to say good morning to her, right?

Of course, I understand what she’s thinking.
But, can’t she stop standing at my bedside like that! It just freaks me out.

As I thought of this, my favorite book (Maintaining dignity: so easy even a goblin can do it! {First Edition}) states, (Even if you take an arrow to your knee, you can’t let any feelings of surprise shown your face! In your goblin life it will lead you to a better tomorrow.)
That is why I must respond as usual.


[….Good Morning. Today Shar is ….. as usual Shar.]

[Good Morning! Master!]


Shar energetically says good morning, as her small frame is over flowing with affection towards me.

In this small dimly lighted room, the spot where that girl stands is bathed in a heavenly light
While being immature the girl with bright orange hair that tells you she will be a beauty when she gets older, shows her happiness for being able to exchange her first words with her “Great” master this morning (afternoon) as well.

That girl, who if introduced to 100 different people would be called charming by all of them, stares at me, I immediately began to feel tired as I restricted my facial muscles. I made the face of the “Respected Master” that I’m so used to now.




After putting on a simple outfit, I came down to the wide dining room, the lunch I am to eat with Shar was already prepared.

As I sat in my chair with nothing special on my mind, Shar told the two servants standing in the corner of the room to leave (For some reason we only have men working here?). She started to hum to her herself as she began to prepare tea and snacks, I wonder what she is so happy about?

As Shar once again sat next to me, I stared at her nonchalantly, then she looked at me while tilting her head.

[Master, Did you make any progress on what you were speculating last night? What shall we do today? …..Ah, yes. It may be a bit early, but what would you like for dinner? Actually, today a large merchant caravan came. When I went to the castle this morning, the square in front of the castle was very lively, it seems the caravan has many special products in stock. I wish to feed Master something so delicious that it will send all of the exhaustion you feel day after day flying!]


Besides maintaining my outer appearance, after eating my fill I was daydreaming. So, I was sadly unable to keep up with the questions and large amount of information that was thrown at me.

A speculated merchant caravan with special products and a lot of activity sent the castle flying….? ….What the hell? I must be wrong.

Here I should just be honest and say,

(Sorry, I have no idea what you’re saying… To begin with my brain is not that good, so after eating it becomes even less so….)

If I say something like that, of course my dignity as her Master will drop like a bag of bricks.
As I thought of this, my brain started to finally catch up. So, I started to randomly utter some general words.

[Shalltear, calm yourself. It is said that time flows equally for all things, but in reality, this is not true. Whether it is a bug or a dragon they have their own time, even humans have their own time. Even among individuals the same can be said. We all have our own time we live in. That is why Shalltear…. …That is to say…your master…that’s right, I will need a bit more time and information to answer your question. (Special translation: Please slowly repeat yourself once again.)]

Ugh, I am definitely not thinking straight…
“In Short”? Even though I was the one talking, I have no idea what I said.

…….That’s right, after (That is why Shalltear) if I said (Don’t be impatient) wouldn’t what I wanted to say get through?

As I was worrying on how she would retort to what I said, I sat there with my heart beating quickly but nothing showing on my face. Shar showed an expression as if she had come to some sort of understanding, and then started some incomprehensible conversation.


[…One’s own time… I understand. That is just like the alchemic technique (Arbitrary Observation Method)! As a practitioner must arbitrarily observe the unstable changes of the reagents they put into the alchemy pot, to better adjust the final quality of the various broken down smelted reagents. It is an important technique… As individual living beings (experience time differently)…, we, as alchemists, must purposefully observe the (infinite number of alchemic techniques)… Yes, they are indeed similar!]


….Crap, What did she just say?
She at least seems to be my disciple, Shalltear.
I, who only ever did simple alchemy, have no knowledge of such a technique.

As I thought if this, I continued to maintain the face of the austere master while the corners of my lips slightly curled into smile.


[Y,Yes. You are right. That is what I wanted to say. Shalltear, it seems you have become quite clever. You make your master proud.]


For the time being let’s praise Shalltear.
…..Hm? However, that laugh right now seemed to be right on the money. I will practice later in front of a mirror, so I can recreate it.


[Hehe, Thank you so much! ….Th,Then. Um, what shall we do….? What would you like to eat for dinner?]


Shar asked with upturn eyes as she innocently blushed.

Oh, she was talking about dinner. That’s why she mentioned the merchant caravan. Thank god, so the castle wasn’t blown up.
As I think back she was definitely talking about something along those lines. I properly understood the conversation, good.

Since I was so relieved, I patted Shar’s head something I rarely do. As I was rubbing her head I responded to her question.


[Right… Once in a while, I would like to have that, “Braised Moa Pigeon (Wild Pigeon) Stew”. Since it isn’t a special or rare product, even though the merchant caravan has come, there is nothing we would need. I am always calmed by that flavor.]


Yes, that dry cheap chicken meat. Sometimes, you just want to eat something cheap.
I, being a peasant at heart, after eating nothing but expensive meals can’t seem to relax, you know.
In the past, I would often cook it in some alchemy glassware lying around and eat it.

I as I thought of this and strong feelings began to well up, Shar’s head, which was still underneath my hand, began to shake. When I started to wonder what was wrong, I saw tears welling up in the corner of her eyes.

Huh? What? She’s been crying a lot lately. Maybe a dish that doesn’t need anything from the merchant caravan was a bad choice?
As I thought this and was worried, it seems my guess was wrong.


[That is so….nostalgic, hehe. It reminds of the day you took me in… It is the first thing Master ever gave me…. I remember it even now. That was truly, truly…delicious. tehee.]


Oh. Really? I fed Shalltear Braised Moa Pigeon Stew 5 years ago when I took her in, huh.

I, myself, cannot remember a single thing, but seeing Shar being brought to tears by this. What is this? These feelings of guilt.

This is bad. If I don’t deal with these feelings quickly. I, who has a heart like a small pigeon, will get washed up in this guilt.

As I thought of this, I proposed something to Shar.


[That’s right. This is a good opportunity. There is no need to rush and buy Moa pigeon meat since it is always available at the market. Shar, how about reminiscing with me today. What, sometimes it’s important to look back on the past. I am sure it won’t be a waste of time.]


Then, please help me remember what happened then so I can find some peace of mind.
[Master… Hic. You’re…right. I understand. I am happy to have the time to slowly talk about the past with Master….*sniff*.]


A soft smile appeared on Shar’s face as she rubbed her head against my hand, that was still petting her as if she is fawning upon me.


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Reincarnated as a Dark Elf ~The strongest magician conquers a parallel world~Prologue 2

Prologue Reincarnation 2



As my body and soul disappeared from Earth, I was remade in a parallel world.

It was a feeling I can’t describe.

I experienced an indescribable feeling as my body turned to liquid and gas.

This must be what it feels like to be in your mother’s womb.


Now, as of this moment I have been split into the testicles of the man that will become my father and the ovaries of the woman that will become my mother. And It seems I am awaiting fertilization.


As God wished for a safe birth, like it wasn’t his business, I was asked.


[Before you are incarnated, I have something I want to ask before you get your new body.]


[Oh what. Should we talk about the birds and the bees?]


[No, nothing concerning that. I wish to know your views.]


[Then ask away. I’ll answer whatever you want.]


After reaching this point, I didn’t have the desire to resist in the least.


[By the way, I was 8 years old when I found out my parents were having sex. I don’t remember being bothered by it. When I was 13 I became aware of the opposite sex. And my first time with a woman was when I was a college student. Since then, I’ve copulated many times. Yet, I’ve never been foolish enough to sow my wild oats.]


[My thanks for the frank confession. Then allow me to ask a more delicate question.]


As this was said, God truly did ask a delicate question.


[There is a young man who has asked you for advice. He is a young boy. Even though he is poor, he has a talent for drawing. But, sadly he was unable to enter an art school. Despite this he still continued to draw. What advice would you give him?]


[I can’t answer the question with only that information.]


[That is a good response. By the way, the young boy has another talent that could be said to superior to the point of being the best among the human race.]


[Then he should focus on the other talent. Talented people should use their talents. It is a disgrace to waste talent.]


[I see. You do have a point.]


[By the way, can you tell me that young boy’s name.]


[I will tell you at the end.]


As God said this, the next question was asked.


[If you had the right to choose your own leader, out of these 3 who would you chose? Answer.]


God listed 3 people.




[His father, amassed wealth through illegal means, and built a fortune.]

Using that money, he eventually became president, and he gained the favor of the people.

Even though he was gifted, he engaged in inappropriate behavior with a woman that wasn’t his wife and cornered his lover until she died.

Also, there were rumors of dealings with the mafia and in the end, he was assassinated.

His younger brother tried to succeed in his work, but the brother was also assassinated.




[He was the poorest president in the world. He was born in a poor household and spent most of his life fighting the military regime. After becoming president, he donated most of his salary to charities, and ate what he grew from his farm. He lived a self-sufficient life. When he went abroad he would fly economy class or ride the airplanes of other countries’ presidents. Even though he was widely loved by the masses, he was unable to develop economic growth for his own country. He lost in the election for president and retired from office.]




[He was a hero who went from battlefield to battlefield as a messenger and received both rank and medals. After becoming the highest ranked influential person, he still wore the medals and ranks he received when he was a solider. With a deep knowledge of the arts, he nurtured young artists and donated to cultural development. Also, he loved animals and was a true dog lover. When it came to women he was very proper, and he never cheated before. After becoming a leader, he instituted bold economic plans the revitalized the economy of his fatherland.]


After hearing the characteristics of all of the candidates, I spoke.


[Is there a choice there? I think there is only one choice to be had.]


[Why do you think that?]


[Politics isn’t about the means but the result. In this case the candidates are limited.]


After taking a deep breath, I began to comment on the choices.


[First let’s start with candidate A, he isn’t even an option. A politician needs to be able to deal with both good and evil, but this candidate is out of the question. The public will never follow such a crafty statesman.]


[Is it desirable for a statesman to be honest and proper?]


[At least they need an amount of self-control that matches their political power.]


[Then is B no good? He was honest and proper.]


[Yes, he was honest and proper, but he lacked ability. No matter what kind of saint you are, if you don’t have ability then there is no point. Politics isn’t a competition of morals, at the end of the day it is who can make the country rich.]


[And then C?]


[Since there are only 3 choices, then naturally this is the one I choose.]


[Process of elimination?]


[Basically, but it is process of elimination in a positive sense. If there was a similar politician in Japan, then I would put forward my vote.]


By the way, can you tell me the names of these 3?

As I asked this, God told me the names of A & B.


[The name of candidate A is the 35th President of the United States of America John F. Kennedy. He was a brilliant man that avoided the collapse of the known world by overcoming the Cuban Missile Crisis, a man humanity owes much to. In his private life he took a Hollywood star as his lover and drove her to kill herself. There were also rumors of him dirtying his hands with illegal dealings.]


[I see….]


I grinned.


[The B candidate’s name is Jose Mujica. He was the President of Uruguay, a small South American country.]


[I’ve heard his name before. I believe when he came to Japan it was a big story.]


[He was a standup person, so?]


[I have no reason to disagree, but even so I would not want to choose him as a leader.]




[As I stated earlier, politics isn’t about the means but the results. Instead of a leader as pure as an angel I would rather an intelligent demon like leader.]


[Is this why you choose the C candidate?]


[Yes, at the very least he is capable.]


[By the way you spoke, it seems you know the person’s name.]


[After being told this much anyone would realize who he is. By the way, the very first question you asked me, about the young man, was about {that man}, right?]




[Honestly, don’t ask such roundabout questions. I guess that’s God for you.]


[So then, even knowing the identity of the C candidate, you would still choose him?]


[Yes, out of all the choices, he is the best politician.]


[The best politician? He massacred many people, and is a man that will forever live in infamy?]


[At the same time, he also he rebuilt Germany’s shattered economy and took back his county’s lands.]


[Depends on how you look at it???]


[God, didn’t you say you wanted me to become a dictator?]


[I did. But I didn’t say to become {Hitler}.]


[I will not become another {Hitler}. Even among dictators, there are different types.]




[There are dictators who use their power for their own benefits and there are dictators who use their power to make a better world. I will become the latter.]


[Hitler is famous for being a dictator with no self-interests.]


[Not necessarily. There are signs of him pursuing power in order to deify himself. The point is he pretended to be a meticulous dictator, but he was drunk on his own power. I will not abuse my authority for such things.]


[If you were to come into power, what would you do?]


[I would see if my beliefs are correct.]




[Yes, Absolute power corrupts absolutely. I wish to confirm if this is true.]


[After becoming a dictator, you wish to see if there is someone who won’t become drunk with power?]




[In short, just as I wished, you will become a dictator, right?]


[That is the only choice available to me, right?]


God affirmed this with an “of course.”.


[Soon your soul shall incarnate and come to life. Even though you are being born, you shall retain the memories of your previous life and be called a prodigy.]


[By the way, in this parallel world what will my social standing be? Will I be born into a noble or royal household?]


[No, you will be born into the household of a mere government worker. A lower grade government clerk. That is where you will start your life.]


[In other words, usurp power using only my intelligence, right? I couldn’t ask for anything better than that. You kill me, then revive me, you just do whatever the fuck you want.]


[If you were born into a house of influence from the very beginning, you would rise to power in no time. That would make {observing} you less interesting.]


But, as God continued.


[I will grant you power.]


[Power? Will I be able to use magic?]


[Something similar. No, it’s even more convenient than magic. I will grant you the power to see through the evil intentions of people. That kind of ability.]


[That’s a bit dull.]


[Don’t say that. I’m appraising your skills highly. With just that ability and your magical talent you will rise up to the top for sure.]


As this was said, God’s voice began to trail off.


[…It seems it’s time for us to part. Shortly, you will be born in a lower grade government clerk’s household. There is one thing I forgot to say.]


[Something you forgot to say? After coming this far?]


As I said this my voice began to fade. It seems I don’t have the luxury to complain.


[Your skin will be darkish brown, a rare sight in that world.]


I thought I would be reborn as a black person, but it seems I am mistaken.


God then said this.


[Your ears will be pointed, and your silver hair will be more beautiful than any other.]


As I opened my mouth, those words didn’t reach God. Nor did they reach my own ears.  That is why I silently listened as God dropped one last bomb.


[You will be reborn as a Dark Elf. In addition, you will be a woman. You will be discriminated against and suffer, in the face of those handicaps you will still succeed.]


[W, wait Besides reincarnation, you never said anything about becoming a woman!! I am a man. If I am to reincarnate at least make me a man!! There are male dark elves too, right?!]


As I screamed this, of course God wouldn’t listen anymore.


[Before long, you will be called the greatest dictator ever. At that time, I will appear before you once again.]


God disappeared after leaving those words.

My consciousness bubbled forth and popped, disappearing without a trace. I was incarnated and born into a parallel world.


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